Feb 2012 Half pint beer glasses have undergone a revolution so huge, in the last 20 years, it’s almost worthy of the phrase “sea change”. Time was, and in my lifetime, too, when women alone drank half pints and the phrase a “lady’s half” actually meant something. No man would have been seen dead with such a piffling amount of booze in his hand. But then no man, as any woman will tell you, has much of the brains God gave a stoat, so anything they say or do shouldn’t be considered of much account. People who know what they are talking about have long since realised that (ale excepted, which is supposed to be warm and flat) this rampant glass-ism has condemned the poor male, so long barred from half pint beer glasses, to a lifetime of lukewarm beer.

Fortunately for the British feller, who, let’s face it, is a bit too much of a dolt to have made the leap for himself, the rise of strong continental lager (now there, at least, is something the British lad is only too at home with), and its subsequent rebranding in the face of the terrifying yobbery groups of brightly shirted yokels quickly had it associated with, has given the half pint glass a new image. Peroni half pint beer glasses are a prime example. They’re designed to look a lot bigger than a half pint, which has two complimentary effects: first, anyone actually drinking a pint of Peroni looks like a dwarf holding a giant’s cup; and two, anyone drinking a half pint looks relatively normal. Peroni isn’t the only premium continental to have hipped itself to that groove, either. Most of the good ones are delivered in half pint beer glasses that manage the dual trick of looking slightly effeminate and abnormally large, which means anyone drinking from one is going to look pretty silly trying to start a little trouble. Moreover, Peroni half pint beer glasses and their ilk have been delivered along with an advertising campaign that suggests that drinkers who don’t use half pints are clueless and unsophisticated. Why? Because, as any woman could have told you, drinking lager from a pint glass invariably means spoiled beer. The warmth of the hand kills the temperature and the length of time in the glass destroys its fizz.

Then, of course, we’ve the half pint beer glasses with handle. These are perfect for (for example) ale festivals, where a person naturally wishes to try as many of the different flavours and varieties as he or she can. Not going to get very far doing that in pints. Half pint beer glasses are all about mediation – a middling amount of everything, which leads to a lot more enjoyment. While we realise it is hard for the British male to comprehend such things, one would suggest that they might give it a go. Who knows – they could even like it.

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